I learned the hard way when Will slapped Chris – DO NOT SPEAK ON OTHER’S MARRIAGES. I had not spoke on marriages before but I was really shook when Will reacted in that way. I was SHOOK. It was a “rug” in my own house being shook out on the back porch. I needed that.
Certain folks mean something to me even though I am living in another part of our world. It’s like the people of Iraq. My heart is with them because I was exposed to their work. In the same way I am sentimental about certain celebrities. Another point of interest for me and bias, is I never had a daughter. I am a Mom to all boys. I remember their struggles in my soul. It’s a hard world out here. I know there are secrets a boy carries that NO ONE can fathom. I saw it in my brothers too. My older brother, so special to me. My first cousins were also boys. That’s how it was in my “world”. For a while I was the first and only girl.
So, when it comes to Tia Mowery’s divorce from Cory Hardrict this is what I have to say: NOT A DAMN THANG.
What I am reminded of is a song that I used to listen to in my isolation growing up:
One Hundred Ways
Compliment what she does
Send her roses just because
If it’s violins she loves
Let them play
Dedicate her favorite song
And hold her closer
All night long
Love her today
Find one hundred ways
Don’t forget there could be
An old lover in her memory
If you need her so much more
Why don’t you say?
Maybe she has it in her mind
That she’s just wasting her time
Ask her to stay
Find one hundred ways
Bein’ cool won’t help you keep a love warm
You’ll just blow your only chance
Take the time to open up your heart
That’s the secret of romance
Sacrifice if you care
Buy her some moonlight to wear
If there’s one more star she wants
Go all the way
In your arms tonight
She’ll reflect
That she owes you the sweetest of debts
If she wants to pay
Find one hundred ways
In your arms tonight
She’ll reflect
That she owes you the sweetest of debts
If she wants to pay
Find one hundred ways
Ya better believe it, whoa
Love her today
Find one hundred ways
I’m telling you
To love her today
Find one hundred ways
Whoa, love her, love her
Love her one hundred ways
Yeah, you’ve got to love her today
Find one hundred ways
Songwriters: Wakefield Kathleen, Coleman Tony, Wright Benjamin F
Now, as a Boy Mom, I want “her” to find “100 ways” too… however, marriages are tricky and NO ONE can pull that “trigger” except the two involved. If Tia Mowery is fed up. She’s well within her rights. Cardi B filed for divorce and her husband “found 100 ways”. Beyonce wanted “out” and Jigga “found 100 ways”. Kim wanted out and she got out. It happens…
When I used to listen to The Black Lamb – he said he and his wife were married over 50 years and 30 of those years his wife gave him the silent treatment. What did he do? He said:
Hoochie Momma
Hoochies (Hoochie Momma)
Hoochies (Hoochie Momma)
Hoochie Mommas
Hey y’all!
This is Marvin Sease (Marvin Sease)
Y’all know what
I’m tired of coming home to the same old dry women
No matter which woman it is
Before I get in the bed good
She’s gone to sleep
Don’t make no difference whether I want to make love or not.
She’s asleep
That’s the reason why I decided to do this
I’m gonna get me a hoochie momma
I gotta put a smile back on my face
Yes! I’m gonna get me a hoochie momma
I gotta put a smile back on my face
I’m not gonna tell you no lie
I’m gonna get me a hoochie momma
Cause she ain’t got no pride, ain’t got no shame
Let me say this y’all
I’m tired of my wife…
And my girlfriend too
And I’ll believe they’re both tired of me
Y’all I’m gonna get me a hoochie momma
I gotta put a smile back on my face
I’m not gonna tell you no lie
I’m gonna get me a hoochie momma
Cause she ain’t got no pride, ain’t got no shame
Let me say this y’all
Well, my wife say she love me
She don’t turn me on
My women say the same thing till it’s time to get it on
I’m gonna get me a hoochie momma
I gotta put a smile back on my face
I’m not gonna tell you no life
Y’all I’m gonna get me a hoochie momma
She ain’t got no pride ain’t got no shame
Y’all know what I like about the hoochie mommas… listen
She don’t ask no questions
She’s always satisfied
Everything I ask her for she give it with a smile
I’m gonna get me a hoochie momma
I gotta put a smile back on my face
I’m not gonna tell you no lie
Yes! I’m gonna get me a hoochie momma
Ain’t got no pride, ain’t got no shame
Hey yall, listen to me
Hey ladies… hey ladies
Can I talk to y’all
Now, I’d like to talk to all the hoochie mommas out there
Ladies, tell me something
What state got the most hoochie mommas?
Can y’all tell me? Huh?
Someone say
New York
New Jersey got… they got hoochie mommas
Look out Delaware
Pennsylvania
Even in Maryland they got hoochie mommas
Look out D.C.
Someone say North Carolina
South Carolina got… they got hoochie mommas
Look out Virginia
Massachusetts
Even in Florida they got hoochie mommas
Look out Georgia
Someone say Alabama
Mississippi got… they got hoochie mommas
Look out Tennessee
Louisiana
Even in Texas they got hoochie mommas
Look out Illinois
Someone say Oklahoma
Even in Michigan they got hoochie mommas
Look out Ohio
California
Even in (indistinct) they got hoochie mommas
Look out Colorado
Japan
Even in Germany they got hoochie mommas
Look out (indistinct)
Someone say South Africa
Arizona got… they got hoochie mommas
Look out West Indies
Kentucky
Even in Utah they got hoochie mommas
Look out Arkansas
Someone say Indiana
Even in Europe they got hoochie mommas
Look out Minnesota
Hey ladies… Tell me something
Did I call yo state?
No?
Well, even in yo state
I know you got hoochie mommas
Hey fellas (yeah)
I wanna share something with you
Now I can’t say this too loud, now
And for God’s sake, don’t tell nobody I said this
You know what fellas?
I heard that Lynn’s wife, Ms. Beewright and (indistinct) is hoochie mommas
But wait a minute fellas, that’s not all I heard
I don’t know how true it is, but I heard that Lilly Jackson, Shirley Brown, and Peggie Scott Adams is hoochie mommas
Did y’all hear that fellas? (yeah)
Huh?
I said did y’all hear that fellas?
I heard that all is hoochie
Hoochies (Hoochie Momma)
Hoochies (Hoochie Momma)
Hoochie Mommas
Songwriters: Marvin Sease. For non-commercial use only.
Like I said marriage is a continent I have only briefly traveled and luckily for me for traveling partner bought a t-shirt, sent home postcards, and hugged me goodbye nicely when I caught my one way flight leaving him and that “land” behind. Respectfully, with some dignity… I think he wanted to be disagreeable, however he respected me as a person much more than the “fantasy” he longed for. He was gallant. I respect that. He never said anything negative. He was GALLANT. Who else is calling their ex that? I am proud of him. I am proud of myself.
What else can be said? I wish Tia Mowery every happiness. I wish Cory Hardrict every happiness.
The pandemic definitely made us take a look at relationships with new viewpoints. Many of us who contacted covid-19 understood that we might die. With The Grime Reaper lurking in the corner of our hospital room, our studio apartment, in our pool house, watching us on the toilet… (I thought) many of us thought, “What have I done with the last 5 or 10 years of our life?”
And so we said to Elohim (I did), “Lords if ya’ll allow me to live through this, I will change my life for the better in every way you all allow me too.”
And now we (I am) determined to do just that – live a life that includes quality, respect, and adoration. If we (I) can’t have love in my life, fine. I will no longer live my life with someone who sees me as a non factor in their lives. My being a non factor in others lives and hanging on trying to work it out made me a non factor in MY OWN LIFE!!! OUTRAGEOUS.
Covid-19 has snapped many of us out of that neglect/abuse trance. As for me, I am grateful.
I Don’t Remember Loving You
I don’t remember loving you
And I don’t recall the things
You say you put me through
You tell me that you’ve had
A guilty conscience for so long
You say that you walked out on me
You say you did me wrong
Well, I just don’t see how that could be true
‘Cause I don’t remember loving you
I don’t remember loving you
You might talk to my doctor
He drops by each day at two
I get a funny feeling when I look into your eyes
There’s something in your smile
That gives my stomach butterflies
You must look like someone I once knew
But I don’t remember loving you
I don’t remember loving you
I heard you mention children
Did you say there’s one or two?
You say I quit my job and then I drank myself insane
You say that I ran down the highway
Screaming out your name
Now that’s not the sort of thing that I would do
No, I don’t remember loving you
I don’t remember loving you
I absolutely positively
Know that can’t be true
But everyone I know here in this place
Is very strange
If you’ll hand me my crayons
I’ll be glad to take your name
In case I run across that guy you knew
But I don’t remember loving you
I don’t remember loving you
And I don’t recall the things
You say you put me through
You tell me that you’ve had
A guilty conscience for so long
You say that you walked out on me
You say you did me wrong
Well, I just don’t see how that could be true
‘Cause I don’t remember loving you
Songwriters: Harlan Howard, Bobby Braddock. For non-commercial use only.
To all of those who forgot me
I don’t remember you… Coletha Albert – Happy Yom Kippur!
Ms Coletha's Blog 