Terence Channer• 1stLawyer – Police Actions, Healthcare & Injury – Writer – The Voice Newspaper contributor – Anti Racism – Tech Enthusiast5h • Edited • 5 hours growing up I often heard young black men and boys talk about finding a nice light skin girl with long hair; “…she light skin with long hair”.
For a black man ironically seeking to “keep it black”, the wife or girlfriend had to be “light skin” golden brown, high colour, fair skin, clear complexion, ideally with a flowing Beyoncé type mane; the straighter the better. The more European looking the better.
This type of black male “aspirational” thinking was standard. This thinking together with the prevalent idealised imagery of White European beauty standards, helped spawn the proliferation of skin lightening products throughout the diaspora from Kingston Jamaica, Kinshasa DRC, Brixton London to Lagos Nigeria.
Hapless dark skinned women in the false belief of having fallen woefully short of the beauty mark, put their health at risk by loosening their purse strings to buy potions, treatments and concoctions (often banned) that they hoped would bestow upon them the elixir of life; beauty.
We had somehow perversely equated skin quality with skin tone; not the same. We had been colonially shaped into thinking that we must aspire to look like our former captors, those that had dominion over us – a sort of Stockholm Syndrome. George Orwell’s novel Animal Farm vividly springs to mind; the liberated animals began to emulate their captors “four legs good two legs better”.
No, we are not responsible for this colonial mentality beginning, but we do have the power to dictate the middle and end of this story.
“Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery. None but ourselves can free our minds”
B Marley
- Never force yourself on anyone else
- Notice the kind of people who want to be friends with you
- Notice the kind of people you want to be friends with
For me, it’s been the reverse. Everyone in my family is jet black, with black hair. I am brown with reddish-brown hair and am an outcast in my family. I have published books, run a blog, raised 2 sons on my own – they have had no extended family because their skin was brown instead of jet black. My support has come from the government, and the police. I have reached out to the Black Community and they blow me off. I have zero Black “friends”. I don’t trust them until I can see what their character is. A concept never extended to me by them. The good news is the day has arrived where character and ethics matter over money and connections. This is the time where those with character and ethics will rise. I am grateful for this.
I have never been married.
I placed a son for adoption.
I raised two sons and one was killed on the street like a dog.
My oldest son’s father told me he would be in my son’s life if I would have sex with him. I left the state of Texas and took my sons with me.
One of my sons is buried in Seattle now for 8 years.
He had a half-brother named Malcolm and Malcolm died November 2020.
The jet-black-skinned family who shunned me, well they have reaped what they have sown just as I have. My life is really great and full of peace and prosperity.
Everyone who is of any character has had no issue with me. Everyone who is clever, no matter their race, color, or creed has been just fine with me and I am just fine with them.
I think it’s been the best for me. Never question why someone is anti-you. I promise you are better off. Do not waste a minute of your time worried about people who are ‘ugly’ to you. It may hurt your feelings or confuse you, that’s normal. Get some therapy and move on. I have been rejected by all kinds of people even my sons. That’s right! My sons rejected me because they expected me to be who they wanted me to be. My sons are like the rest of my family. They get the long-handled spoon as well.
I bind you, Black people, from causing harm, harm to yourselves, and harm to others.
I bind you, White people, from causing harm, harm to yourselves, and harm to others.
I bind you Human Beings from causing harm, harm to yourselves, and harm to others.
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